I Love These People

In the Heights closed last night and it makes me feel sad. It had a healthy run but it deserved to run for years and years. So many Broadway shows have closed this week. I hope there is something still playing when Larry and I get to NYC next month.

I can't even admit to being the one that wanted to go see it too badly. A couple of years ago on a trip to NYC I insisted that Larry choose one show (although I vetoed the idea of seeing Phantom of the Opera, The Lion King or Mama Mia. I guess he didn't have much to choose from) He suggested In the Heights. I was dubious because I don't generally like rap music. But it has turned out to be one of my favorite shows.

I love the guy in this picture, Seth Stewart. PBS did a documentary on the show that featured a lot of footage about him and his struggles as a dancer, including the sacrifices he endured to perform in the show.

I fell in love with the characters. Tickets to Broadway show are so expensive but it's worth it because you get to relive the memories over and over when you listen to the original cast album. It's so good to see so many of the original cast was there for the closing performance. 

At least there is going to be a movie and Lin-Manuel Miranda gets to play Usnavi, the role he created. I can't wait to see it. I hope he takes along Christopher Jackson, Priscilla Lopez, Andrea Burns and  the others. For now I will have my album.

The link to the Playbill article is here: http://www.playbill.com/news/article/146491-Carnaval-Del-Broadway-In-the-Heights-Wows-Audience-at-Final-Performance

Afraid to Write

I have been afraid to post anything on this blog for the last few days, afraid that anything I write would add to the vitriol that pervades the media according to Sheriff Clarence Dupnik.

At first I applauded when  the sheriff  spoke out against what I conceived as the hate spewers on the right, people like Rush Limbaugh, Bill O'Reilly and Glenn Beck. It would be nice if we could blame the people that we disagree with for all the bad things that happen in this world.

But the fact of the matter is there is no explanation for what happened in Tuscon. The guy was off his rocker and that unfortunately is the end to any explanation, no matter how much we want to blame the people we disagree with. After all, we couldn't  blame Rachel Maddow if some militant left leaning lesbian mowed down a placard wielding religious fanatic at a Fred Phelps rally. We'd just blame it on her estrogen level and lack of access to Maybelline.

Should Sarah Palin have put images on line that show different congressional districts in the cross hairs of a rifle? No. But what should Sarah Palin do other than apologize and  head back home to Alaska to feed Trig? I doubt we will hear an apology. As for feeding Trig, I doubt she is going to do that herself unless there is a photo op involved. As misguided as Sarah is at least she aims her guns at animals whether you like it or not. The gunman did seem to call out people with poor grammar though so the Sarah detractors may have some basis for criticism there.

That damn first amendment is so tricky sometimes. If only they had put in a clause that guaranteed free speech to only the people I agree with.

You can be assured that from now on  I am going to pray like the dickens for Kate Gosselin's safety. If anything happens to that woman I will be the first one the authorities come looking for once Jon's alibi is substantiated.

When Did I Turn into Jane Hathaway?

Despite the fact I have enough Christmas gift wrap to last two more Christmases  I found myself in the Christmas section of Walmart  the week after Christmas. By some miracle no new glittered or foiled wrap caught my eye but I turned the corner and spotted the bird feeders and birdseed left over from when the place had been a garden center.

I have an out of control crab apple tree in my front yard and despite the fact I have never fed them, each winter a couple of cardinals nest there.They had been on my mind over the recent snowfalls so I picked up an inexpensive feeder and some premium bird mix fortified with vitamins. I figure someone on my property should be eating healthily and it sure isn't going to be me. (Excuse me now while I go get another Tootsie Roll.)

I filled the feeder and I must admit I have enjoyed watching the birds feed through the big picture window in my living room. The feeder even attracted a couple of blue jays. Then Rocky found it. I only know one squirrel name, Rocky so Rocky is the name I have given to my knew nemesis in life. (Move over, Kate Gosselin.)

The first time I found the feeder tipped over was last weekend when I returned from visiting Larry in Paducah. There had been storms and even some tornadoes in the area while I was gone so I just assumed that was the cause. I sat it right and thought no more about it The  next morning it was tipped over again. I adjusted it  again, this time blaming the fact that I had bought a cheap feeder at Walmart.

The next day I walked outside and there was Rocky perched in a branch near the feeder with his cheeks stuffed with birdseed. He had consumed so much he should have been able to fly like his namesake at that point. Ten thousand trapshooters coverge on Sparta every year and not one around when you need them.

I brought the thing inside,  taped the "roof" to the bottom within an inch of its life and set it back in the tree.

The only problem was I was still in my robe (after all it was only noon). and I had shut my front door behind me. I was locked out of the house. Again! Thank goodness my neighbors were all at work because I managed to expose my best side to their dogs when I finally managed to grab a ladder, dislodge a window and crawl through.

The tape is holding but restocking the  feeder is now a major pain in the part of my anatomy that finally shut those barking dogs up. I think I finally found away to frighten them.

How Did Mark McGwire Hurt You?

I am not a baseball fan. Larry and I finally went to a ballgame in the new stadium last spring and stayed for an inning and a half. It was 95 degrees in May and the sun was brutal. There was no way I was going to tan unevenly just to watch a baseball game. But we would have left anyway because the game is bo-o-o-o-ring. I had to take out a new mortgage to finance the cost of a hot dog and a soda. Where is Suze Orman when I need her?

There are few baseball players that ever captured my attention. Mark McGwire was one of them. There was never  time I didn't think he was on steroids. All you had to do was watch one of his post game interviews wearing those sleeveless shirts with arms the size of hams on display to figure it out.

I loved it when he went before Congress and refused to answer the questions they already knew the answer to. They have a lot more important things to investigate like why captains of Navy ships are making homophobic videos. (That guy is gay by the way. No one who makes that many demeaning gay jokes is straight.  It's only a matter of time till he is caught tapping his foot in some mall restroom)

Today the sports writers gave McGwire only 19% of the votes he needed to enter the Hall of Fame.

He didn't break any rules! And he didn't fool anyone with a brain larger than a peanut. .I could have arms the size of cattle and still not be able to hit a ball coming at me at 90 miles an hour. I would be too busy ducking.

I am tired of this country putting people up on pedestals only to knock them down. He will make it into the Hall of Fame someday, probably for his appearance on Mad About You. You might as well forgive him now, you arrogant sports writing asses.

Just Have the Operation, Johnny!

I know I am supposed to like him but I can't take it any longer. Johnny Weir is fueling all the negative connotations of male figure skating by his constant need for attention.

I have always enjoyed the men's figure skating events over the women. Dorothy Hamill and Nancy Kerrigan were the last women that held my attention. The men just have so much power and athleticism on the ice with their huge jumps. You won't find Johnny concentrating on that. He's too busy trying to be noticed. Hello!!! You are out there alone center ice. Skate like a man!

He doesn't only give male figure skaters a bad name he gives gay men a bad name by feeding into all the stereotypes people have anyway. I think he makes life harder for gay men not to mention gay teens.

I am still an Evan fan. Go Evan! Love the ESPN body issue pics.

Do We Really Need This Much Inspiration?

2011 is supposed to be the year when I finally get the opportunity to live my best life. I know this because Oprah told me so.


Yes. Yes! I caved. My curiosity got the better of me over the weekend and I tuned in just to see what Oprah was sharing.


I  thought that Direct TV wasn't going to carry OWN but they are. Geez couldn't they just put on another ESPN or religious channel?  I suppose Jan Crouch over on TBN is running out of pastel colors to tint her hair and only the big O can provide the makeover inspiration she needs. Sorry, Jesus when it comes to cosmetics no one can touch Oprah's team.

Behind the Scenes of Season 25 was playing when I switched on the television. The title was something  like that. I told you I wasn't going to do research for this blog. And I am certainly NOT going to break that rule for an Oprah post. I  might find something I like about her and I would no longer have a reason to live.


Later that day the episode was running in reruns. It's nice to know that not even Oprah has enough money to run original programming on her network 24 hours a day. What I really wanted to see was behind the scenes of Behind the Scenes. The whole thing looked pretty homogenized to me. I am nothing if not fair though and I do applaud Oprah for appearing on camera feeding her cat without makeup (Oprah was without makeup ,not the cat. As finicky as cats are the cat probably insisted on makeup even for Oprah Behind the Scenes. Wait...it  may have been a dog....I warned you I am not doing research for an Oprah post)


Another program was an overview show featuring Oprah introducing the network. The set was gorgeous, vibrant hues of orange, green and blue. Oprah was in a white off the shoulders outfit (the shoulders are always the last to go!) She looked a lot like Jesus. I bet he wishes he could afford his own network.

I tried, I really tried to watch Oprah's All Stars (I am sure of that title. See, part of my memory is still intact.) But I just cannot stand Suzie Orman. I thought she was supposed to be a financial expert or something but her advice always starts with her saying, "Now take your first thirty thousand and put it in CDs. Take your next thirty thousand and put that in bonds but hold on to that last 30,000 and keep it somewhere liquid." If I had that kind of money I wouldn't need your advice, Suze. Call me when you can help me turn the $4.50 that's left in my checking account at the end of the month into a Park Avenue penthouse.


The show that really depresses me is the reality competition show they are promoting that will give some lucky contestant their own talk show. Damn me for having standards. If I had been following Oprah the last year or so I could have auditioned for this show. I doubt I would have made the cut. I don't think offending people is Oprah's idea of living your best life.

I am too Old for my Phone

Sometime while Anderson Cooper and Cathy Griffin were ringing in the new year my Blackberry Storm decided to die. I believe this was because earlier in the evening I did that thing which I know not to do; allow Facebook to perform an update on my device. If Congress was of any value to the country at all they would ban all computer and cell phone updates within twelve miles of the nation's borders.

I naively assumed that a simple rebooting and recharging of my phone would set things aright but despite numerous trips to my truck in the middle of the night to check on the progress of the recharging (I had left my regular charger at home before I went to Larry's for the new year) my phone remained dead.

All of this means I am the new owner of a device known as a Droid. I realize of course that this means at the young age of 56 I have lived too long on this earth. Jesus take me now. I have outlived my usefulness on the planet.

Back when I bought my Blackberry I suspected that I was trekking beyond  my technological abilities. Within half an hour of owning it I returned it to the Verizon store claiming the touch screen was faulty. Guess what? It wasn't the screen. It was my touch. I still hold to the resolve that it was the phone's problem. If Helen Keller had had to develop the same sense of touch required to manipulate a Blackberry to "talk" she would have happily remained incommunicado.

"But have no fear," the friendly (translation: works on commissiont) sales rep that sold me my Droid today asssured me that this device is light years ahead of my old Blackberry. "Those Blackberries just weren't suited for apps," she informed me while the phrase, "There's an app for that," rang through my head.

I know that learning my new phone is just a matter of learning a new vocabulary, finding where the buttons, sensors or icons lie on my new phone to complete the simple tasks that I was finally learning to negotiate on my Blackberry. But I also  know as soon as I get comfortable with this thing that it will die as untimely a death as my last two phones. 

I am tempted to drain a couple cans of canned corn this afternoon, find an ice pick, make a  holes in the bottoms and get some string so I can finally build me a phone that will last. Text nessages were a lot simpler when I had my last phone of this type too, as long as there were some flat pieces of bark and charcoal lying around.

More and Less for 2011 (last one....I promise)

I want to see more Katy Perry and less Russell Brand, though I must confess I don't listen to her songs until Darren Criss remakes them on Glee. There is nothing like a Christian girl that isn't afraid to show off what God gave her.


It looks like she has started to dip into another hot starlet's wardrobe. Yes, I am talking about Dame Edna. She used to have an eyelash dress too. I wonder if Katy's can wink like Dame Edna's could. I am sure it can't. If Katy's bodice starts winking you can guarantee the FCC is going to start collecting some pretty hefty fines.

Please less Russell Brand. He has an XM radio station now. I don't mind hearing him so much if I didn't have to look at him. His remake of Arthur is coming out this year. Sorry, Russell I didn't think that movie was funny the first time.

I want to see more of the Old Spice Guy and less of those"And I'm a Mormon" commercials. No. I take that back. I don't want to see any "And I'm a Mormon" ads. The Mormons had a perfectly fine public awareness campaign from  the guy that started the Men on a Mission calendars. It was working for me. And what did they do? They excommunicated him. They have no sense of humor.


I hope Old Spice sticks with their guy. Sexy, funny and self-deprecating are a great combination. It's always worked for me. I don't understand why Gillette hasn't called me. Surely they have a line of shower products targeted to the over 50 set they need a spokesman for. After all, I shower. They will have to catch me on  a Saturday night though.

And finally and I know this will surprise you all, I want to see more of Kate Gosselin. That's right. I want to see more of Kate Gosselin. Kate makes me feel good about myself. No matter how many people I lie to, how much I fail to report on my tax return or how many little old ladies I cut in front of at Walmart to get that handicapped parking spot I know there is someone out there more opportunistic than I, someone willing to go on Dancing With the Stars and never once move her feet, someone who is willing to pimp out her offspring for a buck. How many of us wish we could profit from our children? After all why have them if you can't spend their appearance fees? Forget saving up for their college educations, Kate. They are going to need that money for rehab and intense psychotherapy.

The Longest Night of the Year

I have just never been cool enough for New Years Eve. As a kid I remember it being one of the longest nights of the year. My parents used to attend parties called Hootenannies on New Years Eve. My father and some of his friends would bring their guitars and play songs like Wabash Cannonball and Red River Valley for the  hours it seemed to take  for midnight to arrive. Maybe that's because living in the Central time zone, it was only eleven o'clock when we saw the ball drop in Times Square and then we still had another hour to fill.

I can stay up well past midnight most nights but New Years Eve bores me to death. I guess if I drank I would have something to do but I have just never understood holidays whose main focus seems to be drinking. I have never needed to drink to have a good time. Let's face it I don't have a good time that often. It's so much trouble. I need weeks of rehearsal and lots of beads, feathers and sequins to really enjoy myself.

As an adult I have slept through New Years on several occasions. The last few years I have resorted to watching Anderson Cooper pretend to be shocked by Kathy Griffin on CNN while she pretends not to know he is gay. Why can't he just come out? No one is watching CNN anyway. 

CNN fires her every year then hires her back. It must be tough having to top herself each year. But if George Carlin is to be believed there are seven words you can't say on television and Kathy is only on her fourth year. I guess she is good for three more. By then even Fox will have a openly gay host and Anderson's coming out announcement will be obsolete. 

It's tough deciding  which would be most frightening, an out and proud Hannity, O'Reilly or Beck. Please, don't let it be Beck. I would even help pay for the gay aversion therapy his family would be sure to  arrange for him. After all the detox program they put him through was a total succes, right?

I Can't Wait...

Despite the fact that I swore to myself I would wait until I got to NYC to buy tickets at the TKTS booth for my trip in Feb., I couldn't help myself and pre-ordered tickets of Other Desert Cities. At least it is playing Off Broadway so I didn't have to pay the full Broadway price.

This new play by Jon Robin Baitz, who created the TV series, Brothers and Sisters is about a young woman who returns to her parents' Palm Springs home after a six year absence. The premise doesn't sound groundbreaking but that is secondary. The reason I want to go is for a chance to see Linda Lavin on stage again.

I went to see her almost twenty years ago when she replaced Madeline Kahn in The Sisters Rosensweig. I was prepared to be disappointed. I didn't think there was any chance that "Alice" from television could fill Madeline Kahn's shoes. I still don't know that she could because I never got to see Madeline Kahn in the role but I do know that I was mesmerized with Linda Lavin's performance. It was impeccable. Every line, every move, every nuance was perfect. I couldn't take my eyes off her.

This play also features Stockard Channing, an actress I have never had the opportunity to see perform livel.

Who knows? Other Desert Cities may be the only show Larry and I get to see in NYC this trip. Everything except Spiderman is closing the first part of Jan. and none of the new shows I am wanting to see, The Book of Mormon or Priscilla Queen of the Desert will even be in previews by the time we get there. I guess that means I will just have to book another trip to NYC soon.

I doubt  that we will go see Spiderman Turn off the Dark. It doesn't sound so much like a musical as a disaster waiting to happen. Besides I don't feel like spending $250 to see if someone is going to fall into a pit. If I want to do that I can buy a metrocard and watch the homeless people teetering on the edge of the subway platforms like I always do when I am in NYC.

More and Less for 2011 (part 3)

And on we go......

I want to see more Tim Gunn and less Michael Kors on Project Runway this year. I would have said I wanted to see less of Nina Garcia as well but she recently got ousted from Elle magazine and is now working at whatever something called Marie Claire is so I figured she needed a break. (See....I do have a heart)  I would also like to see more of Heid Klum but if she wears her skirts any shorter we are going to see Seal's next offspring before he does.

Tim is perfection. When they expanded the show to ninety minutes last year it seemed to give the producers an opportunity to show more of his lighter side, like the time he cracked up in the workroom over the fuzzy balls one designer wanted to add to a garment.

Michael on the other hand is just too damn prissy for me. If he calls another outfit matchy-matchy I am going to lodge an official protest. My mother told me not to wear more than three colors at one time, Michael and she was a fashion goddess!  But it is his love of "separates" that bore me beyond belief. That's the way we ended up getting a winner like Gretchen instead of Mondo last season. I know Michael has made a fortune off his line of separates. I don't care. So have Jaclyn Smith and K-Mart. And despite the fact she was my favorite angel, I don't think anyone other than the ladies on The View are going to mistake Jaclyn Smith for  a designer any time soon.

I want to see more of the Good Wife and less of American Idol. Actually It's not possible for me to watch much less of American Idol than I already do. I am surprised this show ever became popular. It always seemed cheesy to me. But then if I knew anything about the music industry my CD shelf would have something on it besides show tunes.

The Good Wife is currently my favorite scripted show. I am also riveted to the television when  the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills are on  but I am positive nothing on that show is planned in advance. They always just happen to run into one another at the salons to have their manicures, don't they? Oh and look, there's the film crew!

The Good Wife has the best cast on television. Julianna Margulies, Christine Baranski, Chris Noth, Alan Cumming, Josh Charles (who it took me an entire season to realize was handsome.....that's the way it is with those sensitive guys sometimes). I can't believe I am actually rooting for him to get the good wife instead of Mr. Big.

It's also fun to see which actor or actress that Larry and I have seen on stage in NYC pop up for a guest role, like the time last season when Karen Olivo from In the Heights started dating, Josh Charles' character.

The only trouble with this show is that you actually have to sit down and watch it. If you try to multi-task you are going to miss something. if it weren't for Kalinda, Alicia would never get the client cleared of the charges they're facing and I would have no idea what was going on in the episode.

Flocked Trees

I rarely get the urge to sing How Great Thou Art (I guess I had to watch too many Billy Graham Crusades when my Baptist  grandmother was babysitting me) but I did get the urge on Christmas Day as I was driving to Paducah. Just outside Sparta on rte 154 the Christmas Eve snow we had this year had flocked everything beautifully.

The trees lined the road on both sides. It was absolutely beautiful, not much traffic, a quiet Christmas drive through a winter wonderland. I just kept murmuring to myself, "Oh my God.... oh my God." Finally, I came to my senses realizing How Great thou Art was not an appropriate Christmas selection so I  popped the Bette Midler Cool Yule CD instead into the player instead. Bette pulled through like the trouper she is and added just the right soundtrack to my drive. (until she got to that Hawaiian Christmas tune of hers)